Discipline Can Be Fun

I may not be the best mommy in the world. I have begun to wake up to some of my shortcomings and with therapy and whatnot, am working on rearranging my priorities so that my kids are number one and my husband is number two.

With this comes new challenges every day.

Our newest struggle has come with Isa, our five-year-old who seems to be going on sixteen. Her attitude has amplified and grown to new heights in the past couple weeks. From the flat out ignoring our requests to answering my commands with "NO. NEVER!" to the never-ending tattling to the banshee wailing, she has become an exhausting child to deal with at times.

The final straw for Jose and I came on Friday, when her teacher called me during the school day to tell me that my lil' girl who is normally a gem to have in class, has become a terror. To the point, that the teacher said that she was standing at her desk with an unfinished worksheet and was talking and being disrespectful.

Oh, man, I was furious. She was already grounded for two days from her tv. She was already banned from any candy. She had been sent to her room a million times and had about a million other time outs. When the teacher called, I didn't even know what to say and surely didn't know what to do.

Fortunately, for Isa, she had a couple hours before she came home. Jose and I sat down with her and asked her what was going on. Through a lengthy talk, we came to the conclusion that there are three things that need addressed:

1. She is getting picked on at school. There's this little boy who threatens her and her friends. She said he also calls them stupid and other names.
2. She is bored. She is bored at home and at school. Here at home, we need to set forward some sort of schedule to keep her engaged and going so that everything happens in short time periods and that there is not large lapses of time where we aren't focused on her and Teo. At school, I need to talk to the teachers about how to keep her engaged. She is way above her classmates in some levels and I think that part of that is why she is acting up.
3. We need to spend more time with her. In the busyness of our lives, and with having a nearly 2-year-old, our time has been very tied up and she has been getting the short end of the stick. So, we will be setting some plans into place to focus more on spending time with her.

As for her punishment, we discussed respect a lot. And I am sure we need to discuss respect some more. However, for a direct consequence of acting out in class, she was required to write a letter of apology to her teacher, which she did tonight.

In the last few days, since our talk, her behavior has began to be more acceptable. It's not perfect, nor do I ever expect it to be, but I am very proud of her for taking responsibility for her behavior being wrong at school on Friday and, I am very happy that she wrote a heartfelt letter to her teacher and that she wrote most of it on her own (I helped with spelling on like two words...the rest, she sounded out on her own. And she made her own sentances).

As a mom, I'm always interested in new techniques and tips for dealing with misbehavior...What unique disciplines have you used with your kids and how did they work?