Birthday Party Procrastination

Generally, I'm on top of the game. I have birthday parties scheduled a month in advance with an awesome list of to do's and games and even a menu planned way ahead of party day. Then, I spend the week or two before the party preparing the games, buying all the necessary trinkets and candies and food items, packing gift bags, etc.

This time, not so much. I'm feeling similar to a chicken with it's head chopped off.

It started when I refused to pick a date for the party. I knew that it had to be somewhere around his birthday, but was more than willing to wait until mid-March if I had to. I am beginning to strongly dislike chaos. But, Jose pushed me to pick a day, so finally, I called the church and asked if tomorrow today was available to use the fellowship hall (we have a large family...and when you add in friends, there is no way everyone would fit in our house. Isa's last birthday had over 50 attendees. Seriously...).

The same day that I reserved the hall, I put up a facebook invite and sent out messages to the invited. Then, I did nothing.

On Wednesday, Teo's actual birthday, Jose struck up the conversation in the car on the way home and asked what the plan was..."What plan?" was my reply. I asked if we could just have people come, eat lunch with us, do the cake and ice cream, open gifts and leave. He told me that I was being lazy.

What games do 2-year-olds play? I don't remember adding games into Isa's parties until at least three. So, in his darling attempt to help, he suggested musical chairs. I retorted that Teo couldn't even get INTO the chairs...so, we agreed to disagree for the time being.

Last night, Jose took Teo to the store and bought the food we needed and didn't already have stocked. Chili dogs, hot dogs, chili, PB&Js, chips, and soda.

Tonight, I finally gave in and agreed to go to the party store, only to find out that their hours Monday - Friday are 9 AM to 5 PM. Seriously? Urg. So, we ended up shopping in a nearby plaza and getting the things for gift bags. And after dropping the kids off to my mom and enjoying a nice dinner just the two of us, we returned home to watch a stupid movie and pack treat bags. Fifty treat bags. Then, when the movie ended, Jose took his place in the kitchen (hehe) and I began to be artsy fartsy. I made a mask for crafts and used my printer to make copies (something that I was extremely grateful for because for Isa's 4th birthday, I hand-drew about 30 monster masks), then painted the board for a game of Pin The Tail.

The craft and the game are on the table, waiting to be taken to the church tomorrow later today after we sleep. Jose has made the PB&Js and is finishing up the cake (photos will come after the party). When we wake up, he will make the rest of the lunch and I am going to beg to run to get a quick haircut. We also need to run somewhere to buy our son his birthday gift (which I have no idea what to buy) and then, we will go to the church and set up everything and just wait for the party to begin.

But for now, I need to write my list of things to do tomorrow, in detail, or else I am sure I will forget:

• Call mom to get hole punch
• Take scissors
• Take crayon box
• Grab yarn
• Take goodie bags, board, tails, mask copies
• Buy gift
• Get haircut (I hope)
• Take all the food
• Grab camera and extra batteries
• Buy forks (everywhere we go, they are sold out of disposable forks...weird!)
• Grab scotch tape
• Buy candles (where do these things go after each birthday?!)
• Pack Isa's stuff (she's going to a slumber party straight from the birthday party)
• Go to church
• Blow up balloons
• Set up games and craft table
• Wait
• Eat
• Have fun
• Spoil my son
• Play games
• Cake
• Open gifts
• Go home and nap

Later ya'll. I need to crash!

A Post About Love and Marriage...Never Woulda Guessed on Valentine's Day...

There are a couple chapters in Father Fiction by Donald Miller dedicated to dating, sex, love, etc. so I figured it would be fitting to Valentine's Day.

In talking about romantic relationships, there is a paragraph that I found that I highlighted, underlined, made notes about and basically tagged as vital for me and my life. It says:

"We are not going to get the love we really need from each other. We are going to get it from God, in heaven. Until then, we have an awesome opportunity to practice God's love with each other. We get to commit to each other, we get to try to love unconditionally (at which point we will understand how amazing God is), we get to serve each other by being more attractive to our mates, we get to bring children into the world and take care of them, we get to share our lives with a family. And we get to improve our character. Those are the reasons we should be looking for a mate. Any other motive for getting into a relationship is going to let us down."

Oh. Crap.

Did I fail my marriage when I said "I do." No. However, through the last five (almost six) years of being married, and the nearly 10 years that we have been together, have we had our share of disappointments and let downs? Yes. My expectations, in honesty, we not God-centered. My hopes, my dreams, they were fairy tale at most. So, of course I was let down. Of course, I was disappointed. I had this Hollywood vision of marriage, not an honest faith-based one.

Have I reached this point of loving unconditionally and practicing God's love? No. But I would like to think that I am trying. And, has Jose reached this point? No. But he is trying too. And by watching him strive to become a man of God (especially knowing where his faith walk had taken him), I fall more and more in love with him every day.

Would I change things, if I were to go back and re-do them? No. I would be afraid to. Yes, you read that right...with all the fights, the nights of sleeping alone, the screaming, the throwing things (that would be me), the cussing (again, mostly me), the lying, the cheating, the broken trust, the affair, the other child...I would not change a thing. I am afraid, that had everything not happened the way that it did, that my husband would not be here with me, in love with me, in love with God. And I fear that I would not have worked so hard to save our marriage, to build our faith. And I would fear that we would continue to live a life of false nature, pretending to go through the motions happily, but stuck in a nightmare of non-loving, non-caring, and distrust.

So, for those of you friends who are married or in a committed relationship, would you change your expectations? Do you see fault in your view of your relationship based on what Donald Miller pointed out? And for those who are single and looking, do your expectations meet what is described above? Do you think that adjusting your goals would help your search for a mate?

And, for my husband, Jose Manuel...I love you. More and more every single day. I love to sit and watch you play with the kids. I love to see your strong, yet gentleness while you wrestle and roll around on the floor with them. I love to see you cuddle up with Teo and Isa as you watch a movie or read a book. And I love to peek as you tuck them in at night. You're my gentle giant with the kids. Additionally, I love to spy on you as you cook dinner, with a determination that I cannot understand. And to see you serve me and the kids by cleaning or picking up gives me great joy. I love to hold your rough hands and to stroke your soft cheek. I love to give you eskimo kisses and to press my lips against yours when the kids are preoccupied. I love to try to be held by you, only to have a 30 and a 40 lb. weight quickly latch on to each arm, yelling and screaming, "EEEWWW!" I love to look through photos with you, enjoy a coffee with you, watch a movie with you. I enjoy our time together, whether talking or doing a project around the house. I love watching you move as you work. I love your laugh and making you giggle is a joy. I love that you can always put a smile on my face and make me laugh, even if I am so pissed off at you at the moment. I love the way you disappear for hours to do a project (even if it makes me angry at the time) and although I get angry, I will never stop loving you. I love that we can talk through our problems now, instead of turning to other things or people to find a false relief, and although I hate that you had the affair, I love the man that it has changed you into. You are my husband. The only man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. There is no one else in the world that I want to be with. Only you. Happy Valentine's Day. I love you.

Valentine's Date Night

 

So, in an attempt to be romantic, this morning, Jose texted to say he was leaving work early and taking me shopping for clothes. After balancing the checkbooks, we got into a text arguement because I said we couldn't afford it and that I really didn't need to buy new clothes, I just needed laundry to be done. He grew upset at me. I was saddened by it all.

Therefore, when he got home, the fight continued slightly, until I was crying because I hate managing our money and said that I don't even like clothes shopping. So, we agreed to grab a nice lunch (since most restaurants tonight would be packed with dates) and he could go buy a couple pairs of jeans and I could buy scrapbooking stuff.

After a lunch at Flat Top and a ton of errands, we went to Big Lots (the best place in the world to buy packets of scrapbook paper, in my opinion) and Burlington Coat Factory. Then, it was time to get Isa and my nephew off the bus, pick up Teo, drop off my nephew, and take the kids to my mom. On our way back towards the house, we got stuck in some major traffic due to a warehouse fire downtown, which led to a very frustrated driver (Jose) and a passenger trying to lighten the mood by cracking bad jokes and playing a game of would you rather (me).

After learning that Jose would rather have his feet double in size than his hands, have a car that ran on urine instead of poop, and a wife with no arms instead of no legs, we arrived at the mall. We did a quick meal at the food court, went to Michaels for more amazing shopping (I got a Cricut cartridge that I'm dying to use, a ton more of paper, and lots of stickers), and to the theater to watch Gnomeo and Juliet (sooo cute!!!).

Then, back home to find an awesome surprise: the neighbors left us a goodie bag with muffins and candy!

What an amazing (early) Valentine's Day! It may be one of the best ever!

We Don't Really DO Valentine's Day, But...

For us, Valentine's Day is rarely a big deal. The only year that it really was anything special was 2005. That is the year when Jose bought me a beautiful ring in January to propose, but it was back ordered and whatnot, so as of Valentine's Day, it still hadn't arrived. However, on Valentine's Day, we went to the clinic and it was confirmed that we were about to be parents.

So, this year, I've not thought much about it. We don't do gifts or flowers or candies or much at all. However, since Isa's now in school, I realized that they have a card exchange tomorrow. And, so Jose came by and dropped off Valentine stuff for her class before running out again to help his sister move tonight. So, he will be coming home to this:

I guess I may be convinced to do a little something for future years, but it may always be construction paper and string...

A Holiday Montage

I am awaiting the holiday tidal wave which will leave me unable to post a blog for quite a few days. In anticipation of that, I will leave you with this: A photo montage of our life this past month. We wish each and every person who reads this (as well as the millions of millions who don't) a very Merry Christmas and a blessed New Years!

The best pic we could get with the tree. Excuse my son not wearing pants. They are an option to him.

Isa and her tree that she decorated for her bedroom.

Teo and his decorated tree. See his "special ornament"...yea, all boy.

Master decorator.



The best photo I could get with both kids and both trees. Spiderman was removed to play with.

An upset Miss Kirra. We were babysitting and Jose was trying to coax a smile out.

Teo and Kirra playing with his lovey, "Ah Ha"

After we tuck Teo in at night, he crawls into the hallway to play. Recently, he has gone one step farther: he climbs into the basket, covers himself with clean laundry and sits, "reading" books. :)

A quick stop at Wendy's before delivering gifts. He wanted the bib on so badly, but quickly discovered he could take it off.

This is what I get when I tell her to say cheese. At least there's no food in her mouth...



Teo, however, decided he needed to shove the whole chicken nugget into his mouth. Ugh.

And this is what my hubs gives me when I ask him to smile. He's wishing you "Happy Holidays"...